wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Are we still banned from the library?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
