I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
