: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
it's great music for shaving your balls
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
tell me about the eggs
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
