Im at strip club and am horny
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
