my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
