I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Randomize
