We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
