I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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