Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
