I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
