I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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