we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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