I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Randomize