DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
These tits shall not be calmed
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
