I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
