Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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