i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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