I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize