she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
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