so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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