remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
