so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
