We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
