Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
