Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
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