I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Randomize
