People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
