nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Randomize
