your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
