What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize