I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
