Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Randomize
