I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
You're earring is so big in my mouth
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
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