I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
