Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
