Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Lo siento on account of my penis...
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
