And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Last time i carry you out of a forest
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
