I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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