Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
