I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
