they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
