around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
