She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
So squirting runs in the family.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
