next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
