'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
