no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
