just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
