i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
He is an equal opportunity slut.
this boner is exhausting
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize