Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
