it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
i believe in u and ur pee
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