this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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