we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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