i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Randomize
